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Writer's pictureSpike Woods

PATRON SAINTS OF . . . . .

A few years ago I amused myself by thinking of comical names for particular patron saints.

here are a few - - - - - Lots more to come.


Religious maniacs ----- St Igmata.

The Navy ----- St Ern.

Speech impediments ----- St Ammer or St utter.

Needlework ----- St Itch or St Itchery.

Caffeine addicts ----- St Imulation.

Scrooges ----- St Ingy.

Nettles ----- St Ing.

Hobnail boots ----- St Omping.

Supermarket workers ----- St Ackers.

Plastics ----- Polly St Irene.

Chinese cookery ----- St Irfry.

Lettering ----- St Encil.

Poetry ----- St Anza.

Espionage ----- St Ealth.

Adhesives ----- St Icky.

The Underworld ----- St Ygian or St Yx.

Exclamations ----- St Rewth.

False teeth ------ St Eradent.

Nudity ----- St Arkers.

Flowing water ----- St Ream.

Immobility ----- St Annah St Airlift.

Expanded plastics ----- St Yrofoam.

Bleeding ----- St Yptic.

Gramophones ----- St Ylus.

Elegance ----- St Ylish

Drunkenness ----- St Upor.

Caviare ----- St Urgeon.

Bodyform ----- St Urdy.

Astonishment ----- St Upify.

Tree surgeons - St Ump.

Balance ----- St Umble.

Turkeys ----- St Uffing.

Artists ----- St Udio.

The Harvest ----- St Ubble.

Architects ----- St Ructure.

Arguments ----- St Roppy.

Trains ----- St Ation.

Psychos ----- St Ab.

Racehorses ----- St Ablemate.

Dictators ----- St Alin.

Hayricks ----- St Addle.

Athletics ----- St Adium.

Flowers ----- St Amen.

Markets ----- St Allholder.

Ponds ----- St Agnant.

Jets ----- St Reamline.

Philatelists ----- St Amp.

Posture ----- St Ance.

Bridges ----- St Anchion.

Electronics ----- St Andalone.

Conformity ----- St Andardize.

Little red lights ----- St Andby.

Plumbers ----- St Andpipe and St Opcock.

Archaeologists ----- St Anding St One.

Jack the Ripper ----- St Anleyknife.

Bacteria ----- St Aphylococcus.

Fabric improvers ----- St Arch and St Iffener.

Astronomers ----- St Argazing.

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